An Eternal Bond between a father and a son, Which last even after Father's death.

Today is my Pappa's Birthday. I am remembering the only man who impacted me more than anyone else in this world. In the last days of his life I had an uneasy realisation that his days are numbered and I started spending more and more time with him, shifted my work base to Aligarh, I always used to be overwhelmed with his exceptional command over Urdu, Persian, Hindi and English languages. He spoke awadhi with equal Proficiency. He was never short of couplets befitting occasion. Full of rural and literary quotes. Ammi was full of anecdotes too, her self-deprecating humor would always keep the environment jocular. We were born and bred in an environment where father-son rarely expressed love and affection for each other. His mere presence and deep stare was sufficient for me to understand what he wanted. I dreaded him the most at the same time I loved him the most. We rarely watched TV together. His rare shabashi ( Interjection with Pat on my back) was his extreme expression of love. During covid lockdown , he was struck with acute blader infection, we were vary of taking him to hospital, but eventually we had to, With every passing day he was getting weaker and weaker , He was admitted for 15 days in Delhi. After he was discharged , he was advised critical care at home. We converted one room into the hospital facility at home. In Last few days of his life, he perhaps had a brain stroke ( Medically termed as Seizure ) except eyes he lost complete control over his body and remained in a vegetative state till his last breath. I knew his end was inevitable but hoping against the hope I was sure of a medical miracle that he would survive. On the morning of 17th of september 2020 he passed away peacefully. One by one his IV line, Catheter, Bipap (Non-Invasive ventilator) and cardiac monitor screen were removed. I was by his bedside when he passed away. I was numb, and was holding his hand. I was told that the body turns cold once life goes out. But i realised Pappa was still warm then, I was also told that the subconscious brain of a dead person works for a few minutes and he listens to the words of the surroundings. Suddenly I broke down, kneeled and Hugged him tightly, kissed his forehead, and whispered "please forgive me if I failed you as a son in delivering my duties". Finally, For the first and the last time in my life i mustered enough courage and said "I love you Pappa more than anyone else in this world". Tears were unstoppable, throat was chocked, i was crying profusely, but there was a sigh of relief within my soul to have expressed myself. I still don't know whether he heard my words or not. But he was still warm then and within an hour his body turned completely cold. After the passing away of my father Ammi became reclusive and she confessed to me that she has lost the purpose of her life and within a span of little over a yr she left this world too. Even at the age of maturity, i feel orphaned like a child, as if the shadow of love, comfort and protection have gone forever. Pappa, on your Birthday Today, I am dedicating one of your favorite couplet of Iqbal to you. "Nigah Buland, Sukhan Dil Nawaz, Jaan Pursoz, Yehi Hai Rakht-e-Safar Mir-e-Karwan Ke Liye". (High Aspiration, Pleasing speech, a passionate soul— This is all the luggage for a leader of the Caravan). Despite all odds, you were a true leader. Happy Birthday Pappa, You still matter more than anyone else in this world ! But the bitter truth remains eternal, There will not be another Pappa, There will not be another Ammi around and I have to live with this void forever now.

Death Anniversary of my Mother

Today is the first Death Anniversary of my mother, I can never forget this day, she passed away peacefully after having spent hardly 24 hr on a ventilator in Delhi on 4th Jan 2022 Night. As I sit down to write this note, I can feel multiple emotions ranging from sorrow, deep loss to Joy and happiness. She was definitely a woman of different Era, An epitome of Dayanatdari (Uprightness), Rawadari (Tolerance), Tehzeeb (Etiquettes) and Kindness, She was always ready to help other with her limited means, She was an excellent cook and a superb homemaker, She was good at Soz - Khwani ( Art of reciting Elegies ) Above all, she was a master at self- deprecating humor, she wouldn’t hesitate to make fun of herself. She was way too tolerant than any other woman of her times. Her Urdu was Chaste, She always spoke kind words to everyone, Even to those who were not so kind to her. She was always the first to say salutation even to her younger ones. She had a self-written Urdu Directory for herself, Every Sunday, she would make a point to call almost all close relatives just to seek their well-being. Everything was good till my father met with an accident in 1991. Pappa started mis-stepping with occasional bouts of free fall. He was advised Neurological consultation which ultimately led to his failed spinal surgery. My father walked to his operation table for his spinal compression surgery, but couldn’t move an inch post 5 hr procedure. It was a failed surgery for sure. But, the Neurosurgeon at GB Pant Hospital Delhi falsely assured that everything is right and he just needs the right physiotherapy to be able to walk again. But this was never to happen and my parent’s collective ordeal started. This was when Ammi dedicated herself to the services of my father completely. Owing to prolonged critical care given by my mother, my father recovered to a certain extent but his mobility was limited till his last breath. After the passing away of my father in Sept 2020. Ammi was devastated, she confessed to me one day that she had lost the purpose of her life and within a span of 16 months she left this world too. Sometimes I feel that you have to be old to understand what the real problems of ageing parents are, seeing ageing parents is not a good sight to hold, All of our lives we are always in search of super heroes to seek motivation in life. We read books to appreciate the character and adulate them. But we grossly fail to see that super heroes live within our own families. Needless to say, they are our parents. The Lessons of strength, selflessness, Unconditional love and extraordinary care taught by them are priceless. I was born to one such parent. I am writing this for all those, if you are lucky that either both or one of your parents is alive, try to spend as much time as possible with them, they are in a stage of life where every day is unpredictable for their health. Let them know that they are the best and what they did for us was the best. They are our real super heroes. This was for you Ammi. You mattered more than any other woman in my life, Rest in Peace wherever you are. Miss you every moment.

0.45 Reynold Fine Carbure: A Memoir

0.45 REYNOLD FINE CARBURE: A Memoir 

 This Unusual caption has very impressionable memory on my mind. Till Class VIII, I was a Fountain pen user, but there were always some messy mishaps, leaking ink and Ink blots on Pages as well on shirt pocket. One fine day I was Introduced to 0.45 Reynold Fine Carbure ballpoint pen by a classmate. it was love at first sight, Pen was smooth, good to hold, continuous and worked almost like a pilot pen. Reynold was the pen with viscous ink which dried quickly and didn’t leave smudges. Above all it was water proof. Even a drop of sweat on sultry summer classroom didn’t create a poll of mess on the page.

 What it wasn’t was cheap. Then in 90s, it was dearly priced at Rs 4.5, however all other options were either Rs 1 or max Rs 2 in ballpoint pen segment. Those who could afford, there were Chinese fountain pens and higher ups were using Luxor Pilot gel pens which costed an exorbitant Rs 20 a pen. However, I was a Rs 2 Ballpoint Pen user. 

 It was month of Ramazan when I was introduced to Reynold. So, my next target was to have one. With my own EIDI I bought two 0.45 Reynold Fine Carbure pens. I excitedly introduced the pen to Pappa, he appreciated the quality and asked about the price. Four and a half rupees, I replied. Very expensive beta (Son), Pen is good but You should avoid using such expensive pens said Pappa. Then he went quiet. 

 As a child I was conscious of the fact that our family was financially struggling those days, my father was a govt officer, met an accident, his failed spinal surgery made him paralyzed from the lower limb, He was on special disability leave (without pay) then. We were a decent middle-class family but all of a sudden, we were financially broke and were in deep crises. 

 During those hard times Ammi was managing the house, she was there when all this was being discussed, she said, whatever it takes I will keep on providing you whatever you need to excel in studies. Henceforth, Ammi ensured that I always have sufficient supplies of Reynold ballpoint pens throughout the year. Today when I was in market to buy pen for me. I chanced to see 0.45 Reynold Fine Carbure Pen priced at JUST Rs 8 only. 

 Ah, 90s, Reynold took first mover advantage and milked school students for an exorbitant Rs 4.5, Convert to 2022 money its more than Rs 50 today. It was indeed very expensive for my generation of limited income family. 

 Nowadays, there are no dearth of good quality pens available at Rs 5, 10 and 20 for students. 

 This was for you Pappa, you may not be in this world, but I know the value of money taught by you and wherever possible, I still try to practice austerity. I was extravagant with your limited money. But frugal with my own. Miss you every Moment of life.

AM I AN INDIAN?

This Independence day, I decided to ask myself few questions?

Why am I an Indian, Perhaps,I don’t have any choice, I am born one. If Almighty Lord had consulted me on the subject I still would have preferred India, but requesting him to make it less crowded, less political, more democratic and more affluent.
Am I really a proud Indian? I think I am, As i love my country and I don’t intend to stay abroad other than holidaying and business trips. Contrary to this, I have little to be proud of what I am doing today, as I am hardly contributing to society, just selfishly working to achieve my own personal goals.

Then, Why don’t I get out and settle in some other country? Once again I squarely reject this notion. As most of the developed nations are white and harbor prejudice against all non-whites. In any case I feel more relaxed and at home in India.

I dislike few things in my own country, Mostly the Communal and separatist politics, which compels us to identify ourselves as Hindus, Muslims, Sikhs etc etc Instead of just being “An Indian”. On contrary I am looking forward to get into politics in coming years. I know politics is not same as country but surely its one platform from where you can sincerely contribute a lot.

Am I Indian first and Muslim second, Or is it the other way round? I don’t like the way these question are framed and if I am denied my culture or tradition I would refuse to call myself Indian. I am a Proud Indian, and a person with deep respect for other religions and Traditions. And even so I have nationalistic kinship with one who says I am Indian, Aggrawal and Punjabi, or Indian, Rajasthani or Hindu. I want to retain my cultural and linguistic identity without making them exclusive in anyway. This is what I consider as Freedom of Choice, which our constitution guarantees us.

I am convinced that our unambiguous diversity is our foundation as a nation. The moment you try to eliminate regional language in favor of one national language or religion in the name of some Indian philosophy, you will destroy the unity in diversity. Couple of times our Indian-ness have been challenged. In 1962 by Chinese, in 1965, 1972 and 2000 by Pakistanis, then despite our many differences of language, religion and faith, we rose as one and defended our country. In ultimate analysis, it is the realization of boundary that makes a nation; we have proved that we are one nation.

So, No matter what. INDIA is where I belong, and this is where I intend to live and die.
Jai Hind.

Miles to Go...................................

Disclaimer: It’s no ‘Gyan’ on how one should think of starting a venture and survive, these are my very personal views and experiences, Whatever I say, may not make perfect sense with you, There is no intention to hurt anyone who is planning a career with MNCs, but it’s my call and my views on the things I have done in my entrepreneurial and professional life. I am just writing for my younger friends if they may gain from my experiences, whatever worth it may be. The only promise I make is that I will always earnestly strive to pen down what I believe in my heart to be true and worth sharing about.

I started early, as early that given a choice I would not even recommend to myself doing so. Just out of college, I was absolutely clueless, but had Big Dreams to make it Big in Corporate India. And IT seemed to me the swiftest and softest route.You might also say, “Gosh, this guy talks a lot!” like an energizer bunny and he can go on and on, and this actually an apt metaphor for a Gen Y entrepreneur.

Quick Input: Unless you have truly a fantastic idea with relevant experience, backed with funds, I would not advise you to take a plunge in early twenties.

The thing is, entrepreneurship wasn’t one of many options for me, and it was the only one. The reason for starting the company was to do something on my own i.e. independence. You are your own boss-doing your own thing, setting you own priorities. There was a very strong urge to create something, do something different. To have a real sense of achievement, this only comes when you achieve things on your own. Although, as of now, my experiences and level of success doesn’t make it a fascinating story in terms of revenue or brand equity, but surely in terms of quality of experiences I have had. Trust me friends, It doesn't really matters whether you have an influential uncle or not, in the end you have to make it on your own. There is a certain amount of Pride when you achieve things on your own.

During MBA summer training at Dabur,I had more or less decided, I should be starting my own company, but was clueless about hows and whats of business? i saw the real Corporate and different hierarchies for the first time, that made me to think of my future. If I am fortunate, at the end of five yr I’ll be a Manager, in 10 years I may be a Product Marketing head…in 25 or 30 years I might be a VP or a CEO somewhere. Only when, if I am really very very good, I asked myself is this is what I am going to do in life?

Background:
I have spent my entire life in Aligarh, I did Btech and MBA from Central University, such a sensible career path, the kind every middle class parent charts for their kids, my father was a Govt official, mother was a housewife; there was no business persons in my family.

The truth is I wasn’t very much inspired by Engineering, theory was boring so do Engineering Designs, the only thing which inspired me was Engineering labs, this is where I found real life and practical side of engineering, but sooner I discovered that I am not meant to be on the technical side instead on the people side of business. So decided to go for MBA, I always had strange notions that in MBA they make you learn how to start venture or to manage them, what MBA degree does is provide you a perspective and teaches you everything but never teaches you how to raise Funds. But Surely,MBA doesn’t force you to work for anybody. It’s an degree, that’s all.

Start of Journey
So Delhi was the only option, it was 3 hours drive from Aligarh and the only business city in vicinity, when my other friends were planning to go aboard for studies and Jobs, I was planning to launch my own venture, I never wanted to leave India. I dint had any capital but thrill of doing one’s own thing was palpable. I started my first office from one of my friend’s brother office space. He was kind enough to have offered me free office space for first couple of months. Luckily, there was an angel investor: my father. Who gave me money to support my living expenses! I will always remain indebted to him particularly for this favor, He always motivated me, he is one such man, always full of homily befitting occasions, He advised me to go sensible way and there are no short cuts to success was a lesson well learnt from him since childhood. This reminds of Azim Premji's theory of value based leadership, he says … Values not only help in achieving success but also make success more enduring and lasting."

The thing with entrepreneur that you need to be hardworking and have basic intelligence. You want to stay in business.You want to keep your dream floating, pls don’t care what friends and relatives have to say, you have to bear the cost of your dream. Even few of my relative shunned me saying “yeh ladka apni zindagi kharaab ka raha hai” (This boy spoiling his own life).

Eureka Moment
For that one idea, that one concept or service which is going to make your company something more than an ordinary ‘run of the mill’ story, that one idea which makes your brand in your segment. Ideas can come from anywhere, you could be driving or bathing and have a eureka moment, or in a bus or at dining table or in midst of any other thought or even while gazing at stars.

Software company successes always motivated me, Software was the only and was least capital intensive option i had, The only thing I knew about that I have to address painful area by use of software, but how was the most intriguing question? For this I needed market feedback, it took me another month to think how to do market research on painful areas, so came the idea, that CA (Chartered accountants) is one community which knows all possible painful areas of a Industry, Yes, I was right, I took a list of 50 CA’s from CA website in NCR reason and thus started my own market research “in search of Product”. Luck favored me and most of the CA were really kind to me, may be because I was young and told them honestly what I was up-to, my honest revelations made few of them to introduce me to some industrialist of NCR region, And so after 3 months the true Eureka moment came and idea was to Built Excise software for Manufacturers. As Excise Invoicing and RG records was a tedious task and more tedious was even during Excise audit raids when they (Excise Dept) ask anything at their whims to make illicit money by threatening them with dire consequences.

Lessons for youngsters: Be Smart, Never shy in approaching people,if you are honest with your mission and you have conviction in your plan, eventually, God will help you, provided you are sincere and humble. Always base your business concept on deep customer insights, and then only you can succeed.


First-launch and failure:
With CA’s reference soon I bagged 5 orders to implement software, I wondered then, ‘’how could Software Company like “Tally” ignored this untapped segment’. There was just one competitor USL in Bombay, they were established player but never touched North segment.

My first ever customer was a Manufacturer of Detergent cakes, deal was closed on 65000 Rupee, and 17000 was my first advance payment cheque (I still have photocopy of that cheque) my happiness knew no bounds, I could see my idea turning into a big reality. No sooner I recruited a programming team all hell broke loose on me. USL (Bombay), came to NCR and did their big time launch. They priced it moderately depending upon user licenses. So over-night I had to take a duck with 1/3rd price, they had name, brand and money to skim the market share, I had no choice, I thought if I approach them to become their business partner for Delhi- NCR, this way I will get marketing leads and in the mean time I will benchmark my own product with them. Idea was to work very well, provided they accepted my offer, I met Mr. Sanjay Mehta (the then promoter and MD of company), after my much convincing I was given time of 09:30 am and time slot was 15 minutes at Hotel in Delhi. The Moment I entered into his hotel room I found him little surprised, he must be wondering is he the same Boy, pestered everyone in my company from receptionist to Marketing head to have an appointment with the M.D. Well; he offered me to sit, and said I have 15 minutes and I have meetings lined up till afternoon, there is one thing with these Big-Corporate-guys, they always pretend to be extremely occupied even if they have to sleep and dance the whole day. Thus, gave me his introduction for 5 minute how he started the organization in 1992 etc. He tried testing me my knowledge of market and threw full toss at me by asking "how many software can be sold in an quarter"? Question was absolutely new one to me,I never thought of numbers before meeting, never quit without trying was the lesson well learnt from sports and my innings at fielding irrelevant questions always helped me since college to clear exams, same happened here. Thus he started his Great Arthashatra of sales and marketing, He would ask question that I would answer them, he would ask more and I would answer more. It wasn’t an interview, but a Dialogue over a cup of Tea; Most of questions were related to market size of NCR and future potential in Application market, having myself done market research with primary source helped me a lot in answering him. I could see perplexity and little appreciation in his looks, that how on earth this boy knows so much on the market potential and the product scope without having a practical exposure to any job what-so-ever.

I was sure, he was impressed, but dint know what will happen, meeting which was scheduled for 15 minutes lasted for 2 hr and 15 mins. In the end he asked for what I have expected of him, I Said, Exclusive NCR Business partnership for this product.. He smiled and opened a file, it had business partner terms and condition, which read thus, ….To become reseller you need to be in IT business from last 5 years with Minimum 1000 Sqft office in Business location, and five lacs as Guarantee fees along with three top business references ………I qualified not a single criteria.

There was a lull for another 2 minutes,he was reading my body language for sure, finally said, Nadeem, you are an interesting young man, I generally don’t give more than 30 minutes to any of my meetings, Said Mr. Mehta, it was too much of appreciation for me.

I can trade-off all terms and conditions for you but you need to cough-up guarantee fees and business References, said Mr. Mehta.

I am in Delhi from last few months, just out of college, I won’t be able to pay 5 Lacs, I replied Honestly, I don’t know why, but he thought I may be sufficiently funded or something. With my constant re-rebuttals for commitment for business he agreed as a very special case with a Guarantee fee of 2 lacs, Damn it! even that was out of pocket,2 lacs was too much of an amount for just out of college. It was frustrating, I almost won the battle, it was like qualifying Harvard business school entrance with 100% in GMAT score, but not having sufficient amount to pay admission fees. None of my friend was that settled to have asked for loan, I thought of bank loan option but I had no-collateral and guarantors.

Someone suggested me to go for funding from private sources, I thought I dint want to sign a complex agreements, I have somebody breathing down my neck and be under pressure for growth, I was comfortable leading an uncomplicated life.


ERP story:
Somehow, USL deal was not destined to be closed in my favor, and I continued with my Software development work, in the mean time I met Ravi Arora through one common friend. Ravi,Btech from IIT Delhi, A genius with 10 yr experience in Textile Industry and wanted to create something for Textile companies, he had sufficient experience and he knew that Neither SAP, BAAN, PeopleSoft or any other ERP could cater to this segment successfully. Thrill to launch something big was palpable, Thus we decided to launch India’s first indigenously developed Textile ERP for Spinning and weaving industries.

We bagged our first project for 10 lacs against SAP quote of 50 lacs, and since then there is no look back, As a matter of fact today our level is success is not at all big or very interesting. But the big daddies in ERP industry know us, competitors honor us and our team member regularly get good job offers, Ideally it takes about 5 years to stabilize in Product software market, we have successfully completed first 5 year despite some real tough times. There was time when managing one project looked impossible now perhaps 10 can be managed simultaneously, It was all possible because of team effort, I never looked myself as boss of the company, I look myself as a one of the team member with more responsibilities, I am always open to rational logic as I would be if I were a junior most.

We spent five year in building the ERP product, it’s not that we dint make any mistakes, but the point is, only those who tries....make mistakes. you do learn a lot from mistakes, Best part of making mistakes that you get to know at-least one more way of not doing things. Don't be afraid of mistakes just pray that they are not too expensive. i will write sometimes on the silliest mistakes committed by me.

Now it’s about taking this even further. ‘If you have successfully implemented ERP with good customer references, today even 100 implementation looks possible. Now what I am saying sounds little bizarre, but recently one the industry expert said to us ‘why don’t you launch ERP on Pan-India level and take this further to Bangladesh, Pakistan and Africa where major chunk of Textile units are located. So there is still that sense of thrill, of doubt and enthusiasm, How far can we push ourselves?

There is a very interesting question at times is asked by my friends. How long does it take to be successful? 3 year, 5 yr, or 10 yrs. At what time would the entrepreneur throw the towel? Decide to give up………….i say Never, Although I am not successful yet I could have quit any time in first 3 years and I could have been a failed entrepreneur, but why did I keep going? Because I wasn’t chasing for money only. it was passion, Like Sanjeev Bhikchandani (founder naukri.com) says, if you chase something long-enough, sooner or later you will get lucky, if you really lucky then you will do it in 5 years, if moderately than in 7 years and if you are awfully unlucky you will do it in 10 years. There is nothing called unsuccessful entrepreneur. You are unsuccessful only when you quit and stop trying. Until then, you are simply not successful.

Trust me friends, It’s all about being an insane optimist, you might laugh reading this but you have to be in Love with your venture, be committed to it Emotionally, I never had dilemma, despite problems I knew I am doing the right thing.


SUGGESTIONS TO ‘WOULD BE’ ENTREPRENEURS

Be Honest: Be Honest. You have to be completely honest in your business dealings. Once people know you are honest, they start respecting you for what you are. In the long run this makes for a stronger relationship.

If you are starting a business to make money from the day one, PLEASE DONT DO IT, chances that you will fail, Bcoz there is going to be hard times and you will give up. And if your motivation is not something beyond money, those hard times will test you, you will quit and join something else, but if you are chasing your dream, u’ll sail through the hard times.


Work before u start: Be early to start, you can make mistakes while it’s cheap to make them, working at other companies in early career helps…to understand how other thinks. How it means to be at junior most level in the chain, it also taught how to survive in systems and how important it is to employ people who are talented.

If you want to do something in virtual or service world, create a niche or offer enhanced services in existing market, it makes more sense to work first in same segment. Smaller the better. Don’t join TCS, Wipro or Infosys. Join smaller companies because you will get far more exposure. The larger the company you work in, the less you are able to get to the nuts and bolts, the less you are able to see the bigger picture. Eventually the diversity of experiences and job responsibilities will make all the difference.



Get good team- Sounds wonderful, it’s the team with you that makes you successful, but nothing works without an incredibly talented set of people. Always strive to be with the people whom you like, you will find yourself surrounded by positive energy.

Encourage talent- No matter if s/he is fresher in industry, you must have the intelligence to recognize talent and enterprise in other person, give responsibility even if the s/he fails at first go, sooner or later s/he will be an asset.

Make good contacts: It’s not really important who you are but it’s very important whom you know.

MOST IMPORTANT: Read Good books, I am always motivated by success stories. I always thought, if this guy could do it, why not me?

CONCLUSION: It’s all about following your heart, what i find in many people that there is inner voice but just don’t have the courage to act upon it. pls don’t get concerned about peer pressure. I Don’t want to put premium on entrepreneurship. It’s not a fad or fashion to follow. Geeta kehti hai – Nishkaam Karmayoga- duty without desire. Be a devoted lover.

Always keep in mind, Narayan murthy says: it took me 25 years to become an overnight wonder.

LUCKNOW ::: A city of Traditions

I’ve been visiting Lucknow since my school days. This time I thought of writing about the city, so read History of Avadh and took some inputs from Wikipedia and other websites. As I sincerely feel that I have no business wasting time of people who are reading me at my invitation and request. Whatever I have written is not my original writing, most of the text I have taken from some sources....

On Nov-14, I walked down history's corridors n witnessed the undying grace of the city of Nawabs , Lucknow – The Constantinople of India, The city of delectable cuisines, An upcoming METRO,A city that has a magical cultural and Monumental charm, British residency,domes,arches,tombs stood in their splendor, overlooking shopping malls, undisturbed by the honking of cars. Lucknow is fascinating in the sense that you could be walking through an ultra modern landscape and suddenly bump into an ancient relic.

Going through history, Of all the Rulers of Lucknow (Avadh) I personally liked Nawab Asaf-ud-Daula (1175-97) he was a generous and sympathetic ruler, an incorrigible builder of monuments. He built the Bara - The Imambara with its complicated Bhul-bhulayya surrounded by beautiful gardens, which the Nawab started as a charitable project to generate employment during the famine of 1784. In that famine even the nobles were reduced to nothing. It is said that Nawab Asaf employed over 20,000 people for the project (including commoners and noblemen), which was neither a masjid nor a mousoleum (contrary to the popular contemporary norms of buildings). The Nawab's sensitivity towards preserving the reputation of the upper class is demonstrated in the story of the construction of Imambara. During daytime, common citizens employed on the project would construct the building. On the night of every fourth day, the noble and upper class people were employed in secret to demolish the structure built, an effort for which they received payment. Thus their dignity was preserved.

The Nawab became so famous for his generosity that it is still a well-known saying in Lucknow that "he who does not receive (livelihood) from the Lord, will receive it from Asaf-ud-Dowlah" (Jisko de na Moula, usko de Asaf-ud-Doula).

Walking through the lanes and by - lanes of Chowk and Aminabad one finds Lucknow of yore. The ‘Tehzib’ or mannerism is still prominent and a topic of great appreciation. City still speaks the language of “aap-janab” and the maxim of “pehle -aap” is still a part of everyday life for a true Lakhnawi. – and so natural it is –‘Aadab’ or salutation which has its own sophistication and style. Dress forms though have changed noticeably in the span of a century, yet the beauty and charisma of Chikan (the intricate and delicate hand embroidery), still rules the wardrobe of elites and commoner alike. Lucknow is in fact among a few cities that duly understands the grace of the ‘dupattas’ or the covering cloth. Wisdom, women and wine are the three things truly understood and respected by the Nawabs.

During Nawab rule, not a thing of condemnation but an institution it was the ‘kothas’ (Brothel House), where sons of Nawabs were deliberately sent to learn the culture, sophistication and respect for the fairer sex. Film Director Muzzafar Ali’s unforgettable film “Umrao Jaan” is a depiction of this social institution. Love was found in either Paris or Lucknow– a proof of this is the lovers lane in the posh modern Hazratganj: this lane used as a meeting place for the lonely hearts to escape the monitoring eyes of their parents.

“Kan kauwe bazi” or ‘kite flying’ was not only a pastime but the means of sending love letters to the beloved, “kal shaam kothe pe aana, hum intezaar kareinge tumhara”– Tomorrow in the evening come to the terrace, I’ll wait for you. Such words were written on the patang or the kite and the kite was flown and dropped on the beloved’s terrace.

A interesting story goes that once a Chhote Nawab (young nawab) did this with his beloved and instead of the beloved getting the letter her mother found it and the love bug bit her, assuming that the Bade Nawab (father of Chhote Nawab) has done this sweet and naughty thing, she reciprocated in the same manner writing “Intezaar tumhara hi to tha humein, umra bhar rahein takte rahe, der lagee aane mein tumko, shukr hai phir bhi aaye to”– I was waiting for this all my life, you came late yet now you have come. Thus started the love between the Bade Nawab and the Badi Begum which ended up in their marriage and left the real ones to repent.

Today in Lucknow many things may have impurities but preparations like those of Tunde-ke-kabab, Rahim-ke-kulche nihari, Boti Kababs at Akbari Gate, Ram Asrey ki malai aur lal peda, Raja-ki-thandai, Parathas naans aur sheermals ya Sharma-ki-chaat aur Prakesh ki Kulfi, have held their heads high due to purity and standards maintained. Good eateries in Lucknow are often found in the zigzag lanes of old Lucknow. So many of you would have been born in or around Lucknow like me, but will agree that each day is distinct. The shades of the monuments differ with each sun and moon. You discover and rediscover Lucknow everyday. No one has known Lucknow to the full and will never. That is why : “Jisey Aap Kehte Hain Lucknow – Usey Hum Kehte Hain Duja Jahan” (The place that you call Lucknow – we call the other world)
Although I have given the city a farewell with a commitment that I shall return here again and again to witness its mute beauty.

WHAT AM I UPTO ( IN SEARCH OF MY FINAL PROFESSIONAL ABODE)

Disclaimer: These are my very personal view on things and issues I have learned over the years. There is no intention to hurt anyone, custom, practice or institution. Life is too short to waste time in criticizing others. No one has a monopoly on truth and the correct way Neither you need not to be a hero or martyr to say what you sincerely feel is truth and worth sharing with others. It is just one person's views on things at a particular time. I have learned that everyone evolves and should evolve. Views that one holds true at a moment may change. So will be with me. I am just writing for my younger friends if they may gain from my experience, whatever worth it may be. But they must be the judge of what is good for them for no one can choose for another human being. The only promise I make is that I will always earnestly strive to pen down what I believe in my heart to be true or worth sharing about.

It is a tough and perplexing decision deciding what to do and how to do with your life. I have studied from a government school, then had had an Engineering and Management degree, been active into student politics, an Entrepreneur by choice now a CEO with of an new ITES company in North India and still am striving to achieve my ultimate destination. Most people don't think much about it and go with the flow - perhaps they are right. Ask me, perhaps the greatest outcry I faced while experimenting with my ventures came from my family.

SCHOOL:
I studied in a Government school, then popularly known for its notoriety of student, that beautiful place is called as ‘MINTO CIRLE’ or S.T High School, Established in 1909 named after Lord Minto, the then Viceroy of India. The school campus is well spread in well over 20 acres, with more than 4 playing fields, basket ball court and a huge Football ground, its palatial architecture capable of giving complex to any school infrastructure in India. This year school is completing its 100 year and centenary celebration is happening in October, and I have full intentions to attend it, my love for school will never die as it is a one of best place to get groomed at the lowest possible expenditure on earth (Thanks to Government of India). Very sincerely, The ONLY disadvantage of central government schools over convents / private schools is lack of English speaking environment. I never regretted this SINGLE shortcoming as advantages heavily outnumbers disadvantages.

School days: Since school days I have been an active student and every year I was always awarded the coveted Call monitor badge. Being active into sports (Roller Hockey) my studies were always neglected, at the age of 13, first time I participated in All India Championship in New Delhi. And since then participated into numerous state level, All India and National level Events. We all know benefits of being good at studies so I would not like to add more to it but here are few important lessons I learnt from sports.

First is the value of team work, I think no Management institute in the whole world can inculcate and teach you team spirit the way sport does, Working in an team and yet concentrating on my own performance was the mantra I learnt very early in life. And till date it helped me immensely while managing people I never lose focus of my own responsibilities.

Second and a very important lessons that you learn to accept defeats gracefully, with your head up and eye open, with a grace of a man not with the grieve of a child. This helps you learn not to criticize and complain about your ill fortune instead you introspect to identify the pitfalls and lose ends and make sure that next time this shouldn’t happen to you.

ENGINEERING:We lived all our lives in small towns of Uttar Pradesh, a state in northern India. We four sisters and one brother. Except me, all were exceptionally good at studies, but I was better in sports. And like any other middle class parents of small town India, our parents wanted their kids to be either Engineers or doctors. My two elder sisters Safia and Saba, qualified to enter the Engineering entrance at Aligarh University; and the third one Heena, opted for Law degree, so the option of medicine. Actually, forced upon Seema (youngest of all sisters) she was extremely hardworking and unlike girls, surprisingly good at Mathematics. Now she is a successful doctor in Delhi.

Every-time I won medals or came back tournaments after skipping 7-10 days of school (what a respite it was then) After initial appreciation I was put to counseling by my father, uncle etc ( supposedly well-wishers) and I was given example of how ex-Indian players are living their livelihood, who even have represented India in Olympics, however, this never de-motivated my love for sports, nonetheless, grim reality of how Non-cricketers suffers was embedded in my mind that prompted me to get little serious with studies while pursing sports. To my luck the very year University announced that sportsperson who has either played at All India or National levels will be considered for nominations under “Outstanding sports Quota” in Professional courses provided he/she qualifies the written exam (Now abolished, but earlier University had two Tier selection system in professional courses i.e. All India Written entrance exams and Interview thereafter) this scheme was there in statute, but was never implemented before or after I was nominated. I somehow managed to clear written entrance exams of ZH college of Engineering and Technology, (AMU, Aligarh) exams and so studied (or tried to study) Mechanical Engineering. Seems, as if GOD wanted me to do Engineering and my love for sports paid me good dividends.

Life at Engineering college was interesting and full of fun. Later I felt completely stifled in Applied courses. Except labs, I felt most of the subjects to be too boring and excessively methodical. Till date I could never understand why Applied Mathematics, Physics and Chemistry is taught in engineering. It is like asking a cricketer to play Kabbadi, Imagine, a young fun loving guy, fond of eating, and doing all sorts of things that are interesting and he is being asked to Study applied PCM subjects.

Finally, I reached to a conclusion that subject is never boring or interesting; all depends who is teaching you. Dry subjects like Engineering Thermodynamics (final Year) can actually engross your attention if taught by someone like Prof. Nafees, To me he is the best teacher i came across, he can make you understand the most difficult jet propelling process with extreme ease, and important subject like Material science can be funny if taught by Prof. TinTin, he was extremely famous personality, Tall and skinny, looks that would give Dr. Beam a complex and above all he was unreasonably strict and sadist with students. He always pronounced ‘C’ as ‘T’, so the metal like Copper, Cobalt and Cromioum were sweetly pronounced as Topper, Tobalt and Tromioum, every now and then these metals were inevitably mentioned in his class, and I was always at receiving end of his punishments because of my inability to resist smiles.

Being sincere at skipping classes paid me very well in building good relationship with seniors and juniors alike. Young students reading me should not get carried away by my lack of interest in classes, after years of my Engineering I sincerely feel that it pays to be a good at academics and side by side one can indulge himself/ herself in all kind of fun activities, social agitations etc.

Engineering books were so huge that no sensible person will read them. And the intelligent of course don’t read them. Instead of reading Fluids mechanics or machine design books , I resorted to look at the solving last few year of question papers during preparation leaves, that was the time I was most dedicated in studies , Five points to mug up about every subject without even knowing its practical application etc and simple line drawings using drafter was more than a fun and then I could never understand why we were being asked to draw something we never saw in reality, how can I then draw its cross-sectional views, I knew just to move ahead I follow the herd without questions, you make drawing that you never understood or relate to Engineering but you need to simply mug up the drawing! We Indians are great about mugging up things. We learn to recite even the 100 things that a boyfriend needs to do. Most of course, get so confused with so many different jargons, that they cease to speak. Now you know why Engineers are Intelligent.

K P Jain’s Material science book is off-course is a great fat book. It is best used as a dining table or writing pad and sometimes if kept in book shelve, realizes you that you are doing such a great course. Forget about reading it. Only those with nothing to do and no friends read such books. Forget reading it, imagine the people who write such huge books. Let us all appreciate the people who cut down all the trees of the world to print such books. After all, for the Engineers fraternity, if there are more trees, there will be less Industries/SEZ and hence less job opportunities.

The beauty of Engineering degree lies in its diversity of subjects, although I don’t remember much what I was taught in B.Tech (thanks to my excessive involvements in other activities) you are made to study all possible branches in final year now amazes me how we have been taught Steam Engine to Power Plant from Automobile to Aeronautics engineering and from Industrial Management to Entrepreneurship. Let me confess, of all these optional subjects (I chose in final year) I had just one criteria to choose, ‘who is the teacher’, after having spend good 3 years in college and being in good terms with seniors paid me well, I had complete feedbacks of all optional subjects, and how scoring they can be, so I opted not only the easiest ones but scoring ones too.

By final year, I was known by most of the teachers and till date I am in very good terms with most of them. Being known has both good and bad effects, on good part they help you and even guide you out of the way, at the same time you are deprived of Proxies in their classes. My majority of attendance came from Proxies by friends until teachers started recognizing me. I always believed that peaceful days of youth are not to be killed by attending lectures at 8:00 AM ( Yasser, you would agree with me on this) my house was merely a kilometer from college but I never went to college before 9:00 AM.

Needless to say, I wasn't fulfilling all my parents wishes. Back home, they were proudly telling everyone " our daughters are engineers, lawyer and a Doctor and even our youngest child, our beloved son a engineer”. I always passed with reasonable marks if I compare with the hard work I put in last three days, though. Last three days before Annual exams are generally good enough to mug up class notes and previous year papers... the rest of the story you can make up. Especially if your handwriting is good enough, you can just write some relevant terms in BOLD and underline them. I knew teacher tired from checking numerous copies - should just glance at the sheets and scrawl middling marks. The only true art is in knowing relevant headings and a few diagrams. The headings come from a detailed study of content. And, diagrams, well...... the secret is to go 45 minutes before the start of exam and request caretaker to open exam hall (this is where my PR skill played a major role) and make all important chart and diagrams on table with your pencil, If you had studied the subject and you get to see diagram than half the battle is over. “Geeta kehti hai karam karo, Jo dil main aaee likh diya karo, phal k chinta mut karo”

I remember my final year project was on ‘Robotics’ herein we (four students) had to compile latest trends on use of robotics in industrial applications and to make edge detection software. Compilation of study was easiest part as my other two friends were very dedicated but edge detection software programming was an issue so we asked Amit, our friend and batch topper from electronics engineering to do the software work for us. I would say ‘it pays to be good to others’.

I remember my final year Project Viva, as if it was yesterday, I was nervous when our beloved teacher Khusro Qasim Sir- the greatest teacher I have ever seen, told me that external examiner has come from USA, and he is an expert on Robotics I got so nervous, looking at my face he said don’t worry ‘bacchu’( he sometimes called me by this name) he is a gentleman and make sure that you are dressed in formals and whatever you speak, speak confidently rest I will manage – if it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t have done my engineering with so much of ease.

We four divided the presentation in four parts, conclusion and use of robotics was my portion to present, the moment I was about to start my topic KQ started praising us by saying, ‘these kids have done a lot of hard-work and they have done tremendous job in compiling detailed study which looks like a PHd work’, I don’t exactly remember what I spoke on the subject but we did mention use of robotics in Titanic film for under water expedition, and from there KQ started speaking on impact of robotics in industrial application and viva was over.

I can never forget him. He used to make everyone feel good - not the other faculty though! I owe not just my passing Engineering but what I learn't from him in all four years. He made you feel so good despite the inability to answer a simple question in the first go, that all my life since then, I have always tried to encourage and motivate people rather than criticize them. He helped me be a better person by his kindness. He was no fool. He knew more than anyone else in the Mechanical Engineering department on his subject but he was kind to young students. The most important thing that a teacher needs to learn is kindness - not cleverness. I don't know if I will ever be able to be like him in whatever I do with my life but I think I do try to be kind as (and if) I grow up.

Lesson for students on Viva: Dress smartly, Learn to speak well. If you shoot sufficient bullets in the dark, one will hit the target - if there is one.

Now, Looking at Engineering, I see it as more useful education, without Engineering and Engineers the world would have been a different place. On the other hand Management teaches the art of getting things done the right way at the right time with right decisions, I personally feel that if Engineering and Management course is offered in one Degree (In the name of may be ‘Technology Management’) that would be the best course on earth. If one day I ever become Education minister I will pass legislation that these two degrees are merged in one…

I have given you wisdom on benefits of sports and how to become an Engineer ... not a good Engineer. That lesson comes a bit later............. Do not be afraid... I am a self proclaimed teacher. So I will keep sharing as long as you keep reading. There is much more to Engineering education than all this.......

Next time I will talk why I joined MBA and about my story of experimenting with success, and how few individuals created impact on my life.

PS: I thank my Friends who encouraged me to write this piece of note.